Many times I am miserable because I focus on what I lack instead of what I have. I just keep thinking that everyone else has so much more, and that I have nothing compared to them. But sadly comparing ourselves to other is a game that ends badly which ever way we play it. If you act as if you’re worse off than others, you will believe it, and you will live your life feeling inferior. If on the other hand you act as if you’re superior to others, you’ll believe that too and you will end up living a life of arrogance, and that’s even worse. And either way you are still comparing yourself. Instead we should focus on us, compare us today with us yesterday, and be grateful for what good we have and change what we don’t like.
It’s fascinating how much time, money, and energy we spend trying to have more and be better than others. We look over our shoulder constantly, focusing on what others think of us – and it’s a never ending drain of energy. How many times have you caught yourself refusing to do one thing or anther because of what other will think of you, or buying something or another because you thought others will appreciate you more. Here is a story Sean Stephenson shares in his book that makes a point.
A few years ago, when I was twenty-five, I asked a girl out to a movie and dinner afterward, at a cafe across the street from our theater. When the movie let out, we headed to the front doors of the theater. It was pouring down rain. And not just any kind of rain. We’re talking about big fat Forrest Gump rain!
I smiled at her and said, ”You’re ready?” , ” NO ” , ” Why not? ” I couldn’t figure out what the problem was. All we had to do to get to the cafe was make a quick dash across the street.
”Sean” she said ” we don’t have an umbrella”, ”And… ?” I said in confusion. ”If we get we my hair is going to get wet!” She gave a shudder of horror. ” So what’s the big deal about that ? ” I asked.
Now she was tapping her foot and rolling her eyes. ” Sean, if my hair gets wet, then, well … people are going to stare at me. ” Case closed.
At this point my frustration had risen to a nearly uncontrollable level. I took a deep breath. ” Okay, time out. Let’s imagine twenty-five years have gone by, and we’re not even in each other’s lives anymore, but we think back about this date we went out on where it was pouring down rain and we went running through that rain together. We remember that we stopped and looked deep into each other’s eyes. Wouldn’t that be a memory you’d be willing to create right now?”
A few seconds passed as she gave this romantic idea a thought. Then she shook her head firmly: ” No! I just can’t stand the thought of people looking at me with my hair all ruined.”
It was then and there that I realized this girl was surely not for me. I wanted to date women who were willing to run in the rain, literally and metaphorically. From that moment on, I was determined to surround myself not only with women but with business partners and friends who were willing to be rain runners.
Sean concludes that to take a chance on happiness and adventure is a way to build your dreams. To focus on NOT doing something because of what others might think of you is a way to completely lose touch with your authentic self.
I am a rain runner and so is my sister. I remember many a times we went for a walk in the park near our neighborhood (we live in an apartment on 3rd floor, and we are nature people so more often than not we take walks outside ) and sitting on the bench talking about anything and everything, we would see the bus pass by and out of nowhere we would run to catch it without a thought or a worry of where are we going or why. And that feeling right there, when we decided to go for it and we did, is worth everything.
Are you rain runners?
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